we're off

At the end of the 10th chapter of the gospel of Matthew, Jesus tells His disciples something that I've been trying to particularly put into practice as I've followed His leading about downtown Macon. Here's what he said...

"If you cling to your life, you'll lose it. If you give up your life for Me, you will find it."

Over the past year, dozens & dozens of times, maybe hundreds of times, God has whispered these words to me - "don't cling to your life"

I realize more & more that the life I've had up to this point - a comfortable, servant's life at Christ Chapel SportsTowne - is something I'm clinging to. It's safe, comfortable, familiar, & secure (did I mention safe?). Now it seems He's calling me to be a catalyst for a presence of His people in downtown Macon. I don't know how it's all gonna shape up, or in what order it will shape up. I just know that's the direction I'm supposed to go.

I cling to what I've known, what I've had, what I'm familiar & comfortable with. But He's calling me to something risky, exciting, curious, & very different - like so much of Christ Chapel, there are no models for what I'm seeing & hearing He wants downtown. I really do feel like what I imagine the guys felt like on the Nina, Pinta, & the Santa Maria as they set out for China, sailing west - stark anticipation mixed with some fear of the unknown.

When I told the staff that "don't cling to your life" was gonna be one of the defining scriptures for me for a while, Pastor John said something I've held on to. He said, "I didn't hear the 'don't cling to your life" part. I heard the 'if you give up your life for Me, you'll find it.' "

And I've thought about his statement more than Pastor John probably realizes. For the truth of the matter is that he's right - if I let go of my life - if I don't cling to what I know & am familiar with - that will give God the freedom to produce in me, unencumbered, the life He dreamed for me before the foundation of the universes.

And, what's more, I know that this gig is up to Him. I didn't wake up one morning & decide it would be cool to start something in downtown Macon. God's been gently pulling me in that direction for over a year. And if this is His idea, then I guess He's responsible for the outcome, not me. All I gotta do is be obedient.

I don't know what my life will look like in the future. I know what it looks like now. Even though it seems I'm having to "uncling" from lots of things these days, I realize I'm still in an adventure with the God of the universes. How many people get ot say that?! Strangely enough, though, I'm finding that a quiet contentment is settling over me, even in the face of the tedious, mundane steps I'm taking toward whatever it is He has for me.

Most of the people I went to high school or college with are winding down their lives. They're fixing to retire, buy condos near their children, & play with their grandchildren for the rest of their lives. They think I'm crazy for what I'm moving toward. (I thought the fact I'm crazy had been established years ago!)

But the bottom line is this - there's lots & lots of people God wants impacted for Him in downtown Macon. For some reason, I'm supposed to be a part of that, in some way or fashion. I quit trying to figure out back in the late spring why God seemed to be guiding a guy like me in this direction. God's very creative. So, I've tried to just stop trying to explain my life.

I also serve at a church & with a Senior Pastor & Associate Pastor who are willing to take an enormous chance on a guy like me. Can any of you imagine what an infinite blessing that is, particularly for a guy at this juncture in life?!

So, I say to any of you - "don't cling to your life." The life God will give us is so much more than you can ever imagine.

I don't know what's ahead, but I'm headin' out. I know "God both precedes me & follows me." (Psalm 139:6)

Who wants to go with me?