discipleship revisited

Proverbs 4:25 Look straight ahead,
   & fix your eyes on what lies before you.

26 Mark out a straight path for your feet;
   stay on the safe path.

27 Don't get sidetracked;
   keep your feet from following evil.


I'd like to think out loud for a minute...

This blog today is inspired by a note my sister, Sheila, sent me yesterday about trusting God, & the lack thereof...

Sometimes if we've imbued our whole concept of servanthood & discipleship with success, leadership models, & the American dream?

We seem to feel that servanthood & discipleship can only be measured by how successful we are. And if we're not busily being about the business of serving & following that somehow we're not quite the servants & disciples we should be.

Maybe sometimes we're just supposed to be. Is our penchant for always knowing what to be & do a subtle, or not so subtle, expression of control?

Could our desire to always be doing something for humankind, making progress, making things happen, being effective, growing, getting big more about being successful in the eyes of those authenticators in our life & less about following God?

Does following sometimes really mean just that - following - & not asking a gajillion questons, knowing what's ahead, making plans, working the plans, administrating outcome(s) of those plans, growing those plans, & getting big?

Sometimes, if we're going to be &/or do something for God, we don't necessarily have to be big?

Sometimes, maybe what we're supposed to be about is something either seemingly or actually quite small?

Could it be that sometimes we're not supposed to race through life at a hundred mph's - that we're supposed to walk very slowly, & sometimes to stand still?

Is it a lack of trust if we can't just "be still in the presence of the Lord & wait for Him to act"?

What would our lives be like is we really were able to say "whatever" & relinquish not only the control of our lives to Him but relinquish the expectations we & our human authenticators have for that life of following Him?

My thinking seems to be moving more into something very basic. I don't know if it's simply a safety mechanism, to get me through this season, or if God is simplifying my concept of life while jettisoning the success orientation models & expectations we've hung on to the meaning of the words servanthood & discipleship.

I feel like I'm moving toward a more different way of thinking about servanthood & discipleship. Don't know what it means - since when have I known what much of my life means?! :-) LOL

I don't know if any of this made any sense.
Anyone want to comment back?